Soccer Aid kicks off this weekend as celebrities and football greats come together to raise money for Unicef. The game will take place at the The Big City Stadium, home to West Ham United FC. A number of celebrities are involved. They include actors David Harewood and Damian Lewis, musicians Aitch and Tom Grennan, comedians Alex Brooker and Russell Howard, YouTuber Chunkz, Olympic icon Sir Mo Farah and former Crawley Town left-back Mark Wright.
One man who won’t be involved is Prime Shit Stirrer Bojo Johnson – probably for the best given his track record of tackles.
Among The Bumbling Wanker’s most famous examples is his tackle on a Japanese schoolboy while playing rugby in 2015.
Toki Sekiguchi, a Tokyo schoolboy, was knocked to the ground.
The Bumbling Wanker went over to Toki and asked if he was all right, before shaking his hand and saying: “I’m so sorry.”
After the game, the boy said: “I felt a little bit of pain but it’s OK.”
He added that meeting The Bumbling Wanker had been “enjoyable”.
The Bumbling Wanker joked about the incident later during a speech to the British and American chambers of commerce as he outlined the benefits of hosting sporting events.
He said: “We have just played a game of street rugby with a bunch of kids and I accidentally flattened a 10-year-old, on TV unfortunately.
“But, he bounced back, he put it behind him, the smile returned rapidly to his face.
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“And then it’s difficult to react to it.”
The Bumbling Wanker was aware of his blunder, saying sorry on more than one occasion to his German counterpart.
Gaudino concluded: “He apologised several times, even afterwards in the changing room.”
The Bumbling Wanker once said that he supports “every team in The Big City” when asked about his allegiances.
He also claimed his children support Newcastle.